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Finding Peace

noose

Peace

My head reels with the stinging pain of last night’s events.

Thoughts of you caused me to become disobedient.

At least this time it was a strong dose of alcohol.

You always said I would forever be your babydoll.

I remember a time when you loved with such passion.

You said no woman you’ve loved would fair in comparison.

The adoration you gave me was overwhelming.

I didn’t see the wound inside you festering.

I’ll never forget your white boy face and deep brown eyes.

Mystic, somber pools of emotion that terrifies.

Something behind them obsessed your heart and inner soul.

I felt myself helplessly falling onto a black hole.

I often think back to what you said pushed you to the edge.

That even a mere glance of me was your sole privilege.

Your possessiveness and insults made me such a wreck.

I saw the love in your heart through the marks on my neck.

I tried to leave but you wouldn’t pardon my release.

Hunting me down wherever I went to find inner peace.

You thought you couldn’t exist without having me.

There was no way in your mine I’d ever be free.

I finally decided I had to end this fate.

The pain and suffering wouldn’t let me hesitate.

I still feel your haunting stare upon me behind the shadows.

But at least I know it was coming from the gallows.

© Ilex ~ Midwestern Plant Girl

 

Happiness

cryingeyeLightning illuminates the raindrops upon my lashes with the crash of thunder forcing me to open my lids to the grim reality of the vision of you through the glistening orbs as opposed to seeing you through my own eyes as thoughts of you dance upon my mind my skin tingles from the yearning of your touch and my heart drops down to the pit of my stomach where the ache has become unbearable from the painful emotions buried deep inside my soul burning to bring themselves out and envelop the very essence of your being that has taken over my heart that longs so much to have you possess it and bring it back from its despairing hollow state of worthlessness that has encased me for too long but with my own mind’s eye I see the love you send me through only your words and the clouds clear to show the rays though the silver linings of your soul completely filling the empty parts of my body with joy and the nurturing you have so much to offer my heart that to share your soul would mean my ultimate happiness.

© Ilex ~ Midwestern Plant Girl

Alone

manonbeach

Alone

All alone in the moonlight,

I envision your face again tonight.

Images still make me cry.

Feelings consume me, I try to deny.

Day breaks; I try to be free,

but your memory is haunting me.

Oh, there’s nothing I can do,

I only feel emptiness without you.

The last time you made me depart,

you thrust a knife deep inside my heart.

But the pieces will begin to mend,

when someone has another to lend.

Never will you ever find,

someone to treat you so very kind.

Someone to take care of you,

now that you’ve said we’re through.

I hope the emptiness of your frozen heart,

makes you realize you have to make a start,

to sort your feelings out inside,

and get rid of all that false pride.

Think about what I’ve said,

and all my poems you’ve read.

Love is a two way street,

and it doesn’t start with everyone you meet.

 

© Ilex ~ Midwestern Plant Girl

Unspoken

hands-over-mouth

Confidence, Gave-up, Forgotten, Pent-up, Put away.

The normal contentment of my body,

has changed to rapturous yearnings.

You’ve infected me with your passion.

How can you be so empowering?

Oh Baby! What you do to me!

{You} Enslave my mind, my heart, my soul.

I’ve lost myself to your stirring essence

Emotions so hard to control.

I never forgot the day we met,

electric energy flowed straight to my heart.

{My} esteem so vulnerable.

Should have felt the connection from the start.

How can I explain my needs?

My true heartfelt longings,

When you in frau with another.

Hand over my lips restraining.

Self-preservation is not part of me anymore,

you matter more to me than myself.

Possessions, Obsession, Transgressions,

I consult your feelings before mine.

The strings of my heart you pull,

strain from the pressure of desire.

and if you let go,

my heart will retire.

Unspoken

Thoughts you trapped in my mind,

Unspoken

My heart’s so confined,

Unspoken

Words I want to find,

linger through the air again,

Unspoken

© Ilex ~ Midwestern Plant Girl

Image credit: Hufington Post